need another drink. this is the easiest way
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
