I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
i just made my gag reflex go away.
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
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