Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
Randomize