Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize
