I must be too annoying 4 u.
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
