I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
Panties = found
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize