So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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