Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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