If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
and you fell through a lawn chair
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
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