just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
Randomize
