there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
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