There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
Randomize