Whats the glycemic index on semen?
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Randomize
