I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Never underestimate the power of titties
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
