How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
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