I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize
