what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize