I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
2020 sucks, I want a refund
Randomize
