This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
I think people are normalizing furries
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
