Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
