talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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