do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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