Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
Randomize
