its not stalking. its research.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
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