This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Randomize
