we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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