dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize
