why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
Randomize
