dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize