i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
