i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize