I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
