I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
