we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
Randomize
