Fuck appropriateness.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
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