Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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