I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
