there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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