That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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