My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Randomize