she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
