so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Randomize
