What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Found your dick twin last night
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Randomize
