I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize
