I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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