Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
Randomize
