he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Randomize
