Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
I can't breathe out the right side of my face
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Randomize
