The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
I'm too high and old for this...
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize
