Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Couch. On fire.
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