I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Randomize
