Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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