if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
Randomize
